


like a heartbeat drives you mad

by narcissacronin



Category: Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure (Cartoon)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, One-Shot, Unrequited Cassunzel, at least i think it is, mostly just a study of sorts on cass' character/thoughts before the betrayal, title is from dreams by fleetwood mac
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:41:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27391396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/narcissacronin/pseuds/narcissacronin
Summary: For a brief moment, Cass was struck with a temptation to settle close to Rapunzel, wrapped in her arms for what might have been the last time. But there was a voice in the back of her mind, whispering that she shouldn’t.Shecouldn’t.And though it was small, it seemed to grow louder and louder with each repetition, its words echoing throughout her skull.or, cassandra's thoughts the night beforedestinies collide
Relationships: Cassandra/Rapunzel (Disney: Tangled)
Kudos: 46





	like a heartbeat drives you mad

Cass found her eyes drifting back over to Rapunzel once again, though this time she was too tired to bring herself to care. Instead, she merely released a silent sigh and allowed her mind to wander as she studied the sleeping princess.

Rapunzel seemed more restless tonight than usual and was constantly shifting in her sleep. A few times Cass even caught her mumbling something incoherent, brow creased. Cass chalked it up as nothing more than Rapunzel being nervous for the day that lay ahead, but still, part of Cass worried, not quite used to seeing Rapunzel like this. Even though Rapunzel hadn’t said anything that would lead to cause for concern, Cass suspected that this Moonstone thing was a source of more stress for her than Raps was letting on.

Just then, Rapunzel started shifting in her sleep again and rolled onto her back. A thin beam of moonlight streamed in through the window above their beds, casting Rapunzel’s delicate features awash in its soft light.

For a brief moment, Cass was struck with a temptation to settle close to Rapunzel, wrapped in her arms for what might have been the last time. But there was a voice in the back of her mind, whispering that she shouldn’t.

She  _ couldn’t. _

And though it was small, it seemed to grow louder and louder with each repetition, its words echoing throughout her skull.

To be truthful, Cass wasn’t quite sure when they had started pushing their beds side-by-side. On a few particularly cold nights back when they’d first set out on the road, Cass remembered the two of them huddling together for warmth at night, but those days were almost like a blur in her memory now. She did remember, though, holding Rapunzel extra close the night after they’d been turned into birds, fear still coursing through her veins even all those hours later. Rapunzel had clung to Cass, too, that night, but when morning came neither spoke of it.

Those first few nights, Cass had found it hard to fall asleep, all too aware of Rapunzel’s presence lying next to her. But slowly she started to grow used to it and after a while, Cass even began to find that sleep came much easier when Rapunzel was near. Something about her presence was calming and even though Cass was her sworn protector, she found it much easier to drift off at night with their beds pressed together.

Though Cass told herself that it was only because lying that close to Rapunzel meant it was easier to protect her at night, deep down she knew that wasn’t really why.

With a sharp intake, Cass forced her gaze away and turned her attention to the window. It was too dark out to see much, but the moon cast just enough light for her to make out the silhouettes of the treetops and a flock of birds that were flying overhead.

It didn’t take long for her thoughts to drift from Rapunzel to the Moonstone, a wave of varying emotions suddenly washing over her.

She was going to do this.

She  _ had _ to do this.

So far it was really the only chance she had at forging her own path. And also, Rapunzel already had her destiny, so wasn’t Cass deserving of one too?

And if anything, Cass  _ deserved _ this. Practically all her life she’d trained to be on the guard, but her chances of that seemed to get slimmer as the days went on, so really, Cass didn’t have much to lose here. Her chances of becoming anything more than Rapunzel’s lady-in-waiting were nearly nonexistent now. And while Cass could be promoted to something with a little more standing later on, she wouldn’t hold her breath on it. 

Moreover, it wasn’t power or some fancy title that Cass wanted. She wanted freedom: Freedom to make a name for herself that didn’t involve Rapunzel or servitude, to choose her own path in life.

No longer wanting to dwell on those thoughts, Cass took in a deep breath and allowed her gaze to wander back to Rapunzel, considering for a moment how taking the Moonstone would make Raps feel.

It would break Rapunzel’s heart, that much Cass knew.

But would Rapunzel even care a few months down the line? Would she even spare Cass so much as a single thought a year or two from now?

Surely, she’d have moved on by then. Settled down back at the castle with Eugene by her side, engaged or maybe even married, and Cass would be nothing more than just a vague memory of a lady-in-waiting who once served her.

Or, at least, that’s what Cass kept telling herself, hoping it would lessen her pain. There was a chance—a  _ small _ chance—that Rapunzel might remember her as something closer to a friend.

Maybe even  _ miss _ her.

A dry laugh escaped Cass’ lips at just the thought. Though she knew Rapunzel cared for her, as both a friend and maybe even something a little more, she imagined that taking the Moonstone would ruin whatever semblance of a relationship they had built. Whatever they had now would dissipate.

And as scared as Cass was for what would come next, her hunger for self-agency ran much deeper and just about outweighed everything else she felt.

Rapunzel may have been trapped in the tower for eighteen years, but Cass had been cast in Rapunzel’s shadow for over nineteen. And ever since Rapunzel returned, it seemed to grow darker and darker, to the point where Cass felt that she would be forgotten entirely if not for her status as lady-in-waiting. Besides, Rapunzel had already gained her freedom and found her  _ destiny _ , and wasn’t Cass worthy of the same?

But even after everything, Cass still felt a growing fondness for Rapunzel that traversed into something beyond friendship. It made her feel vulnerable, almost as if she’d let her guard down, and it nearly drove Cass mad trying to control all her different (and sometimes conflicting) feelings.

And sometimes...sometimes Cass allowed herself to contemplate Rapunzel’s sentiments towards her, a small yet hopeful part of her thinking that maybe Rapunzel might return similar feelings.

Cass thought back to a few weeks ago when they went swimming in a nearby stream. It was no Lost Lagoon, but it was stifling hot that day and the water was just cool enough to be refreshing. Though that day was sort of a haze in Cass’ mind, electricity still bolted through her nerves when she thought about how Rapunzel had nearly kissed her. Cass didn’t quite remember what exactly went through her own thoughts at that moment, only that she practically tripped over herself trying to step away from Rapunzel and a wave of dizziness crashing over her. When they arrived back at camp, Rapunzel went on as if nothing had happened, which just made the whole thing even more perplexing. But honestly, Cass almost preferred it that way; it made it easier for her to pretend as if it had just been a figment of her imagination or a silly dream. 

Regardless, Rapunzel already had Eugene and all of Cass’ more romantic feelings were ultimately meaningless. She’d be better off moving on now than having her heart broken later down the line.

Even still, when Cass turned her focus back to Rapunzel, a warmth, something almost like love, filled her chest and a smile small tugged at her lips despite her attempts to mask it.

A shiver suddenly crept it’s way down Cass’ spine as a slight chill seemed to settle over the wagon. She pulled her legs to her chest and rested her chin on top of her knees. She stayed like that for a long moment, indecision still raging within her thoughts. Once again, she found herself tempted to lay back down next to Rapunzel. But she couldn’t—

Could she?

_ It’s just for one night more _ , Cass reasoned with herself.  _ After this, you might never see her again, and whether you wish that to be true remains undecided, but make this moment last _ .

A tear slipped down her cheek, landing with a near-silent  _ plop _ onto the fabric of her sleeve. She swiped at her eyes with the back of her, sniffling, and quickly blinked away the rest of her tears before they could fall. She wouldn’t cry—at least not like this.

A small yawn escaped her lips and with that Cass decided to finally give into temptation. As she laid down for the night, she reminded herself that she didn’t really have a choice; either be stuck in a life of servitude filled with a constant longing for something more, or live life as she pleases with no boundaries or walls to stop her.

And the latter sounded far more appealing.

Trying her best to stay silent, Cass maneuvered herself under the covers and turned on her side so that she was facing Rapunzel.

Rapunzel, still laying on her back, had her face slightly tilted towards Cass, one arm outstretched beside her and the other resting on her torso.

Cass hesitated for all of half a second before settling close to Rapunzel. She rested her head against Rapunzel’s chest, setting one of her hands on Rapunzel’s waist. Cass shut her eyes and desperately wished for sleep to come quickly, wanting to focus on just about anything other than what tomorrow had in store.

But uncertainty still weighed heavily upon her and so she fell asleep with a heavy heart, unable to quiet the battle that raged within.


End file.
